Magic Seeker

I have been seeking real magic since I was 5 years old and went to Disney World. That was magic. Ever since I have been in search of that magic fix. I tried Sex, Drugs, Music and Religion. These are the stories of my daily search. Oh, and I might throw in a political rant once in a while. Some of my passions are Music, Computers, Electronics, Xootrs, Skiing and Karate.

Monday, November 21, 2005

Blowing glass and Drum audition

Interesting weekend I had. A bunch of us went to a glass blowing studio in Brooklyn. It was a lot of fun. They actually let you get you hands dirty and make a work of art. I would recommend this to anyone who needs to fill an artistic void.

Also, Sunday night I had a drum audition in Manhattan. The music was interesting and I had a lot of fun, although I was a bit nervous. There was really only one or two times when I totally screwed up. The drummer before me was a "real" drummer. I am a "real" amateur.

Oh well.

I also have an acting audition this evening. Feast or famine with this artistic stuff.

Sunday, October 02, 2005

I am Ashamed of Americans

Below is an excerpt from "The guardian", a UK newspaper. I double checked the poll results and they all check out or are close enough. I couldn't find the poll about the Sun revolving around the earth, but I do not doubt it.

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The American world view:

64 per cent of people questioned for a recent poll said they were open to the idea of teaching creationism in addition to evolution in schools, while 38 per cent favored replacing evolution with creationism.

40 per cent of Americans believe God will eventually intervene in human affairs and bring about an end to life on Earth, according to a survey carried out in 2002. Of those believers, almost half thought this would occur in their lifetime with a return of Jesus from heaven.

1 adult American in five believes that the Sun revolves around Earth, according to one study carried out last summer.

80 per cent of Americans surveyed by the CNN TV news network believe that their government is hiding evidence of the existence of space aliens.

70 per cent believe it likely that Saddam Hussein was involved personally in the 9/11 terrorist attacks.

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Shame on the American public for being so ignorant. We are in trouble here. We need help.

I say we teach Astrology in science class. How about Alchemy? Better yet let's teach our children that purple leprechauns created the world in 1938!

There is no more scientific evidence for creationism than my leprechaun theory.

The creationist's say "Oh but the bible tells us so! And there are missing pieces in evolution theory! Even anomalies that go against it! Evolution is just a theory!"

Rational people say "That is the definition of the Scientific Method! As we study a topic we learn more about it. We make a guess based on the evidence and try to test our hypothesis. Sometimes science is wrong, but it always inches closer to the truth and full understanding of the Universe. We do not pretend we know all based on antiquated text and then twist reality to conform to its unprovable and imprecise language. By the way, Einstein's Relativity is just a theory yet it allowed the creation of Atomic weapons. You use 'theory' as if that is some sort of detraction from its validity. Ask anyone that was in Hiroshima in 1945 if theories have no validity."

Have you even read your own Bible? Do you just pick and choose which pieces to believe. What about when there are gross inaccuracies in your "Holy" book? Ask yourself real questions about the origins or your "Holy" text. How do you explain the contradictions and inaccuracies contained therein?

Movements come and go. This happens to be a scary one because so many of my fellow Americans are just not thinking. They are holding on to this make believe warm cozy blanket called religion. Open up your minds and close your bibles before this country becomes a wasteland of non-thinkers and lemmings.

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Thursday, September 29, 2005

Spirituality without the Supernatural

I have been wondering about this recently. I am starting to lose hope that there will ever be proof of the supernatural. I still have a strong feeling there is something out there. I feel a connection with the universe that cannot be empirically measured.

I have come to grips with the fact I cannot intellectually justify belief in God, never mind the divine inspiration of the Bible or any religious dogma. If there is no supernatural how can I be spiritual?

I feel spiritual when I look at a beautiful scene, like a sunset over the Hawaiian skies. But if there is nothing supernatural about the universe then my spirituality is just my brain reacting to a stimuli. That leaves a cold feeling in my belly.

Schrodinger's wave equation cannot be derived. It came to him while staring into the sea. It was the universe giving him information about itself that cannot be found by observations or extrapolation. This makes me wonder about a universal consciousness. Perhaps by random chance his neurons lined up just right and gave him a secret about the universe. Perhaps.

I need to see God. I need to connect to the Universe. My intellect is killing my soul.

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Thursday, September 08, 2005

9/11 Four Years Later

Every year a friend of mine comes out for the 9/11 memorial service. We go to the World Trade Center site a walk around in silence to mourn and show respect for the dead. Each year the crowds have gotten smaller, the pain seems a little less and the events of that day a little less real. I must add I did not lose anyone directly.

The number of dead doesn't even sound so horrific after the whole Katrina massacre where 10,000 may be dead. 30,000 may have died as a direct result of the Iraqi war. We will never know the exact number.

There is also Africa. 100,000 dead in the Sudan. As many as six million in the Congo have died since 2000 according to an International Rescue Committee study! Six Million! That is 6,000,000!

I don't intend to belittle the pain and suffering that happened that day. But while I walk around the World Trade Center I will be thinking about our world as a whole. I will be thinking about all the suffering, disease, death, corruption, greed and cruelty happening now and the recent past. In silent reflection I will ask what ever powers that may be to help the human race. Some would consider that prayer.

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Friday, September 02, 2005

New Orleans

I have been hesitant to comment on the situation in New Orleans and surrounding areas. It is just too painful to believe this is really happening. How can our federal government be so incompetent. FEMA didn't even know that there was a problem at the super dome until Thursday! Were they not even watching the news? It seems that no one is at the helm.

With all the money our taxes have contributed to the cause of Homeland security and making the world safe for democracy, I would have hope that we would some semblance of order and a plan to rescue these people.

The benefit of having a fascist government should be a strong federal government that can get things done quickly and efficiently. Mussolini making the trains run on time, for example. We don't even have that. We have an incompetent fascist state that does nothing but grind its money making machine for the cronies that built the government with political contributions.

I am shocked about the racial differences. 99% of the refugees are African American. I guess I was just not in touch with the severe racial dichotomy that still exist in America. This leaves no doubt that these people need a helping hand in education, employment and social programs. I don't know what these programs would be. I need to research and think before I voice my opinion.

However,I don't agree with affirmative action. I think leveling the playing field through education and child care programs that are available to any of our nations poor would be a good start. There would not be any racial qualification, only economic.

"God save these people" is an empty statement. "People and Government save these people" is more in line with what needs to happen.

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Monday, August 29, 2005

Sudan, God strikes again.

I was impressed by CBS's "60 Minutes" story on the Sudan and the atrocities that are occurring there. I knew something was going on there, but I had no clue as to how bad it actually was. I searched around the internet and found little on the subject from American sources. I found a story about Condoleezza Rice visiting Sudan and talking things out with the Sudanese government. Here is a country that is doing far worse to their own people than ever done by Saddam. Yet her conversations with them seems to be of such a casual nature it was as if she was visiting France.

Rice said "I said to the Sudanese government that they had a credibility problem with the international community, because there are promises that have not been kept. But it is a new day in Sudan as well. I just met, as you know, with [Vice President] John Garang. There is a peace agreement between north and south. They are forming a national unity government with people who also lived in terrible conditions at one time in this country. And so we have to support that process while insisting that the unified Sudanese government do everything that it can to improve the situation."

A credibility problem!! They are bombing villages and sending in the Janjaweed to finish of the survivors.

Darfur has been decimated and has been almost completely destroyed by the Janjaweed with support from the Sudanese government.

Rice's understatement of the realities there makes me think something more must be going on there. Everything she said about US effort was said by Colin Powell just over a year ago, yet 300,000 people have died since then. We have done little to end the violence.

The stories told by the refugees was of the most horrifying kind: Rape, murder and racial cleansing.

What could possibly cause people to do such heinous acts? Religion! Again and again I come to the conclusion that religion is the ultimate evil. Death and destruction to the infidels in the name of God, the one true God, God is on our side. How long can we live with people who think this way? How long will intolerance, ignorance and arrogance rule the minds of the religious?

Yes, I am saying that all religion is bad. It is divisive, anti-intellectual and used to manipulate the masses to the point of murder, rape and all out war for the powerful few in the name of God.

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Wednesday, August 24, 2005

The American Taliban - Seriously Disturbed People

This is the most disturbing site I have ever seen:

If these people do not scare you to your bone or you agree with an ideas put forth on this page you need have your head examined. I hate to resort to name calling but I am so angry I feel like resorting to violence! These people are so un-American that if the founding fathers heard their nonsense the would rise up and kill them as traitors to the cause they for which they fought so hard.

These people are trying to take over America and take away our religious and personal freedom!

I do not want to deny anyone the right to practice their religion, but I will do all I can do the deny them the right to enforce their values on me.

I see a war coming. It will be the closed minded religious right against those of use with reason, science and a real sense of patriotic duty to support the freedoms for which our forefathers died.

These people using Christianity to propagate hate and intolerance.

We people of reason need to get angry and speak loudly lest we become a Fascist Theocracy!

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Monday, August 22, 2005

San Francisco

I just got back from a wedding in San Francisco. I live there for five years before I moved back to the New York area. It amazes me how much I miss living out there. I really feel at home there. There is a certain vibe in the air that just doesn't exist in NYC. I saw several shows/performances, went to several bars and visited my old neighborhood.

I love the weather there! Some folks would hate 60 degrees in the summer and constant fog, I find it perfectly comfortable.

The wedding was a great event. Well planned and all around good people. I was in the wedding party so I felt quite special.

No political rants just pleasant memories today. I had a really good time and all is well with the world for five minutes.

I have avoided reading my usual news sources this morning.

Have you ever just wanted to give it all up and live the Bohemian lifestyle? The grass is always greener, I know, but once in a while you just want to run your fingers through your neighbors lawn.

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

God said I have a right to be here!

I don't fully understand the circumstances behind the Gaza evacuation or even the whole Palestine vs. Israel conflict. I am not sure anyone outside that region really does. But I got taste of the madness that takes over peoples' mind that are be behind all this violence.

A woman that was being forcibly removed from here home in Gaza screamed "God said we have a right to this land and no one has the right to live on this land except for Jews". That statement is just as insane as someone saying "Kill all infidels". People who think they have a right to something because God told them they do are extremely dangerous. It is exactly that mentality that leads to killing in the name of God.

Religion has the strange side effect of giving good people excuses to do bad things. Religion was used to justify torture. Religion was used to justify slavery. Religion was and is still used to justify capitol punishment. Religion is being used to justify destroying the environment and starting wars to hasten the end times. Religion is used to justify terrorism. Religion is used to stifle scientific progress. Religion is used to repress women. In my opinion, religion is a VERY dangerous thing in the wrong hands.

Anyone who believes that their religion is the one true religion and that they are somehow "chosen people" should think about how they came to that conclusion and what impact that very conclusion has had on the world. They should examine the origins of their holy books. Seek out evidence, any concrete evidence, that they are right. Words on a two thousand year old scroll do not count as evidence.

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Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Are we living in a Fascist State?

I have found this repeated several times over on the internet. I am repeating it because it needs to be. The American people need to understand that we are living under a fascist regime. The pendulum needs to start moving left.


FOURTEEN CHARACTERISTICS OF FASCISM

Dr. Lawrence Britt, a political scientist, wrote an article about fascism which appeared in Free Inquiry magazine, a journal of humanist thought. Dr. Britt studied the fascist regimes of Hitler (Germany), Mussolini (Italy), Franco (Spain), Suharto (Indonesia), and Pinochet (Chile). He found the regimes all had 14 things in common, and he calls these the identifying characteristics of fascism. The article is titled "Fascism Anyone?," and appears in Free Inquiry’s Spring 2003 issue on page 20.
The 14 characteristics are:

1.. Powerful and Continuing Nationalism – Fascist regimes tend to make constant use of patriotic mottos, slogans, symbols, songs, and other paraphernalia. Flags are seen everywhere, as are flag symbols on clothing and in public displays.

2.. Disdain for the Recognition of Human Rights – Because of fear of enemies and the need for security, the people in fascist regimes are persuaded that human rights can be ignored in certain cases because of "need." The people tend to ‘look the other way’ of even approve of torture, summary executions, assassinations, long incarcerations of prisoners, etc.

3.. Identification of Enemies/Scapegoats as a Unifying Cause – The people are rallied into a unifying patriotic frenzy over the need to eliminate a perceived common threat or foe; racial, ethnic or religious minorities; liberals; communists; socialists; terrorists, etc.

4.. Supremacy of the Military – Even when there are widespread domestic problems, the military is given a disproportionate amount of government funding, and the domestic agenda is neglected. Soldiers and military service are glamorized.

5.. Rampant Sexism – The government if fascist nations tend to be almost exclusively male-dominated. Under fascist regimes, traditional gender roles are made more rigid. Opposition to abortion is high, as is homophobia and anti-gay legislation and national policy.

6.. Controlled Mass Media – Sometimes the media is directly controlled by the government, but in other cases, the media is indirectly controlled by government regulation, or through sympathetic media spokespeople and executives. Censorship, especially in wartime, is very common.

7.. Obsession with National Security – Fear is used as a motivation tool by the government over the masses.

8.. Religion and Government are Intertwined – Governments in fascist nations tend to use the most common religion in the nation as a tool to manipulate public opinion. Religious rhetoric and terminology is common from government leaders, even when the major tenets of the religion are diametrically opposed to the government’s policies or actions.

9.. Corporate Power is Protected – The industrial and business aristocracy of a fascist nation often are the ones who put the government leaders in power, creating a mutually beneficial business/government relationship and power elite.

10.. Labor Power is Suppressed – Because the organizing power of labor is the only real threat to a fascist government, labor unions are either eliminated entirely or are severely suppressed.

11.. Disdain for Intellectuals and the Arts – Fascist nations tend to promote and tolerate open hostility to higher education, and academia. It is not uncommon for professors and other academics to be censored or even arrested. Free expression in the arts is openly attacked, and governments often refuse to fund the arts.

12.. Obsession with Crime and Punishment – Under fascist regimes, the police are given almost limitless power to enforce laws. The people are often willing to overlook police abuses, and even forego civil liberties, in the name of patriotism. There is often a national police force with virtually unlimited power in fascist nations.

13.. Rampant Cronyism and Corruption – Fascist regimes almost always are governed by groups of friends and associates who appoint each other to government positions, and who use governmental power and authority to protect their friends from accountability.

14.. Fraudulent Elections – Sometimes elections in fascist nations are a complete sham. Other times elections are manipulated by smear campaigns against (or even the assassination of) the opposition candidates, the use of legislation to control voting numbers or political district boundaries, and the manipulation of the media. Fascist nations also typically use their judiciaries to manipulate or control elections.

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Why Buy Citgo Gasoline?

I stumbled across a web page that talks about Citgo Corp. The parent company is Petróleos de Venezuela (PDVSA).

This means that buy purchasing gas from Citgo you are not supporting Saudi Oil and the money goes primarily to Venezuela.

Jeff Cohen writes
"Instead of using government to help the rich and the corporate, as Bush does, Chavez is using the resources and oil revenue of his government to help the poor in Venezuela. A country with so much oil wealth shouldn't have 60 percent of its people living in poverty, earning less than $2 per day. With a mass movement behind him, Chavez is confronting poverty in Venezuela. That's why large majorities have consistently backed him in democratic elections. And why the Bush administration supported an attempted military coup in 2002 that sought to overthrow Chavez."

From my research it looks like the Bush administration did not directly support the coupe. But it is quite obvious that the did not directly oppose it. US oil companies have a lot to lose if they are kicked out of Venezuela and the Bush administration has made it obvious that they will do anything to support US oil companies.

I have been to Venezuela and I have seen the poverty first hand. It is a serious disgrace that US oil companies are taking money out of the hands of the desperate people to line there pockets. It is true that these companies helped to build the infrastructure that allows oil production, but that debt has long since been paid.

Of course we should be directing our efforts towards renewable resources and using mass and human powered transportation. But if you are buying gas you might as well direct your money towards a better cause.

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Friday, August 12, 2005

Global Warming Still Under Investigation

The last comment I heard President Bush say about global warming is "We are investigating the possibility of Global warming. We cannot make policy on theories."

Ok, here are the latest headlines that I quickly gleaned from various news sites:


This is the news we are bombarded with on a daily basis. All of these articles are from just the past two weeks. Why does the President fail to see the obvious? Why do the folks to my right consistanlty fail to act on such a serious matter as our global climate? Simple, they are hoping this will all just go away so they can continue to line their pockets and the pockets of their cronies. If they "believed" in Global Warming then they would have to take action that would affect the bottom line of the companies that paid the get them in office.

I believe that no action will be taken by the US Government until: Florida had been destroyed by hurricanes, crops fail in the midwest, NYC has to build dikes to keep out the rising water and... well you see the pattern here, they will not take action until it cost them money directly. This could possibly be an end to the way of life we are used to. Our children will look back at our inaction and stuburn ignorance and perhaps learn a lesson. That is the only good that can come of this.

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Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Xootr Scooters

are awesome products. I have owned two this past year. I ride them fast and hard. So much so that I usually damage them within about six months. I use it to ride to the in the morning from my condo in . It is seriously the best way to get around in NYC. It is just like snowboarding on pavement.

I highly recommend a to anyone who has to get around a city and needs to go only few miles.

A few things to know about Xootrs before you go order one:

  • You have to get the optional rear fender unless you don't mind getting splashed with God knows what from gutters.
  • Steve in the warehouse is the best! He is honest and supports his product.
  • Know what size bump or pothole you can jump or you will be doing a nose dive into pain
  • These things are tough but not indestructable. A six inch curb is about all you should try to jump.
  • If you don't get the rear fender test the wear on your shoes when you brake. You can ruin a pair of shoes very quickly.


Let me know if you get one or have one. I would like to hear other peoples' opinions, problems, tips and tricks.

Sunday, August 07, 2005

Death

There comes a time when we all think of . I think of it all the time and none of the time. It intrigues me yet I cannot believe that it exists. I know it exists for other people but how can I die? I have always been here as long for as I have been here.

Then I think of the 15 billion years that passed before I existed and I wonder if that is what death is like. Is death like the time I was put under to get an operation? Time did not exist, it wasn't blackness or pain or heaven, just nothing. Where was I at the moment of the ? Where was I when the first creature asked "Why am I here?" Where was I when Jesus died on the cross? Where was I when my parents met?

I am the miracle at the end of a trillion trillion trillion accidents and coincidences. We have all already won the lottery a trillion times over just by being here now. We are ephemeral. We are prescious. When we die it is sad.

But at least we were here.

Friday, August 05, 2005

Spa Magic

After four years of working for a spa marketing company and hearing nothing but talk, I decided it was time for me to have a spa experience. I was apprehensive. After all, are for women, right?

I was far from the only man there. At least a third of the customers were men. I immediately felt relieved. OK, so I’m not the only guy here and everyone has been very welcoming so far, but what about the actual ? My biggest fear was that some big hairy guy name Günter was going be my masseuse, so I requested a female.

I was handed a robe and some slippers and lead to the men’s changing room. I was a little self conscious about walking out and about in nothing but a robe, but everyone else was dressed that way and I soon forgot there was but one thin velour belt between my birthday suit and the rest of the world.

I sat in the “Relaxation Room” — a room with magazines, water and dried fruit — for a few minutes with other robe clad folks until Tiffany came in and asked for me to follow her. As we walked down the hall I began to notice how wonderful this place smelled. It wasn’t perfumed or incensed, but clean and refreshing with a slight hint of burning candle. The lights were dim and the candlelight made the shadows dance on the walls in rhythmic motion with the soft mood music that was playing just loud enough to tickle your ears.

As we walked into the treatment room I realized that I somehow had to get under a towel on the table. I guess it would have been fine to disrobe in front of a complete stranger, but I was happy to hear her say “I’ll be right outside while you get on the table and cover yourself.”

Then it began. Her hands were warm and created a symphony of movement. I was surprised at the multitude of variations in her technique. I didn’t say a word, I was almost afraid to move as it might break the . I was never in danger of falling asleep, but I was in an altered state of consciousness. I was floating. My thoughts were of happy times. Images of my wedding day, flashes of my honeymoon and the memories of the time I had the lead role in a college play meandered through my mind. I never entertained one inappropriate thought. That surprised me more than I’d like to admit.

Then it was over. After getting dressed I met up with my companions in the Relaxation Room. They were still in their robes, sipping lemon water. Sitting next to them I realized I felt uncomfortable fully dressed.
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